The fear of losing control over one's own behavior is a fairly common phenomenon and is closely related to the fear of losing mental clarity or even one's life. This type of disorder, which has neurotic features, serves as a defense mechanism against:
- actions that may pose a health risk, such as going skydiving or participating in risky parties with alcohol;
- behaviors that may cause social disapproval or negative reactions from society;
- behavior that is highly uncharacteristic of the person in question, making it seem as if someone else is doing it, not the person himself\herself.
This helps us conclude that the fear of losing control over ourselves and our own lives is rooted in the personal boundaries we set for ourselves. People who are used to keeping everything under strict control are especially afraid of losing it, experiencing fear in its primordial form, which is scientifically labeled as phobophobia. While most people experience quite specific phobias, such as fear of flying in airplanes or terror at the sight of snakes and spiders, phobophobes live in constant fear for their mental health. For example, a person suffering from acrophobia (fear of heights) feels fear when standing on the 20th floor, while a phobophobe feels terror not from heights, but from the thought that they might suddenly feel the urge to take a step into the abyss.
Is there any benefit from fear?
Although the question seems unusual, the answer is pretty obvious - yes, there are benefits of fear. Fear makes an electrician not to go to work after drinking alcohol, restrains an angry office worker from destroying furniture and equipment, realizing the possible consequences of such actions. We weigh the pros and cons before taking steps that could harm our own or others' health, property, and so on. Such fear is directly related to the survival instinct and is embedded in us by nature itself.
When should you start to be afraid of your fear?
You should start to worry when the fear goes out of control and ceases to fulfill its protective function, turning into a phobia that interferes with your normal life. Phobophobia paralyzes a person, shackling them with chains of gratuitous and irrational terror of the world. It is recommended to take an anxiety level test to understand how serious your condition is.
Panic attacks
Panic attacks are common in phobophobia sufferers. It starts with an accelerated heartbeat due to panic, then adds breathing problems, tinnitus in the ears and head (autonomic system dysfunction), and ends with a state of stupor that is difficult to explain. Such attacks are a vivid example of psychosomatic reactions, and the more phobophobia develops, the more frequent and intense panic attacks become. Fortunately, not always the situation reaches the point of panic attacks, and they can be dealt with by seeking help from qualified professionals.
Three questions to ask yourself
Everyone experiences anxiety, but for some it remains within reason, while others develop into pathological fear, accompanied by panic attacks and neuroses. Ask yourself a few questions, the answers to which will help to determine the level of your fear:
- How responsible am I? What will happen if I start acting without looking out? In what situation might this happen? Will there be people around who can prevent me from acting rashly and point out my mistakes? The answer is certainly positive - there will be such people.
- Does a mad person realize his\her condition? Obviously not, just like an alcoholic does not recognize their addiction. People with serious mental disorders are convinced of their normality, while they doubt the adequacy of those around them. Beginning to recognize one's problem as a mental health patient is the first step toward healing. If you fear losing control, it means that you already know how to manage the situation.
- What happens if I lose control? Aside from the unpredictable consequences, you will likely think about how you will be perceived by those around you. Weak, gutless, whiny or, on the contrary, aggressive, violent and ruthless. This goes back to the fear of others' opinions and the fear of ourselves, real and authentic, not fictional and imaginary. Work on your self-image, your self, and realize that it is impossible to please everyone at once and meet all expectations. After all, you are not "a bargaining chip to please everyone."
Remember:
- learn to relax, try yoga or autotraining;
- get to the root of your fears, analyze them;
- dive into analyzing your childhood fears that may have been a trigger for your current phobia;
- think your fear through to its logical conclusion, visualize its outcome in detail. It will usually turn out to be ridiculous and absurd;
- remember that crazy people are never afraid to be crazy or to think of themselves as sick. So you are definitely not one of them;
- free your life from unrealistic expectations, be simple and down-to-earth!
